Funny/Odd things heard on the scanner

[bohica]

over 20 years ago I was filling in as a dispatcher. We had a call about a woman driving her car through the front window of a 7-11 convenance store. I dispatched it as a single car accident, no injuries,at the drive in window of 7-11. Needless to say someone said (over the air) that 7-11s do not have drive in windows. I said "this one does now".

[PMJ2kx]

Just happened on Washington County (OR) fire dispatch (keep in mind that our dispatchers can be real sticklers about open mics)

(open mic)
Firefighter 1: Um...I guess 400
Firefighter 2: Guess higher
Firefighter 1: Okay, I guess 500
Firefighter 2: Guess higher!
Firefighter 1: Alright, I guess 1000...and maybe not higher than 5000
(muffled noises)
Dispatcher: Engine XXX, check for an open mic...Engine XXX, check for an open mic...[then very quickly and quietly], and I guess 1200. FIRECOM clear.

It doesn't read as funny as it sounded, but oh well...

[Nightjock]

I always thought it was strange how much I enjoy listening to the Tim Hortons drive thru and headsets. I think Dunkin Donuts uses encryption. (shakes fist)

[spdfile1]

Originally Posted by Nightjock

I always thought it was strange how much I enjoy listening to the Tim Hortons drive thru and headsets. I think Dunkin Donuts uses encryption. (shakes fist)

Nightjock,

I put an extensive list together of fast food drive thru freq.'s in my area and up in NY. So I hear ya!!! I find it funny it when people order a double quarter pounder w/cheese, large fry and a DIET coke!!!!!!!!!

[TrenchFeeder]

Originally Posted by spdfile1

Nightjock,

I put an extensive list together of fast food drive thru freq.'s in my area and up in NY. So I hear ya!!! I find it funny it when people order a double quarter pounder w/cheese, large fry and a DIET coke!!!!!!!!!

My friend does that all the time and it drives me up the wall. As if the 30 fewer calories will really make a difference.

[spdfile1]

Originally Posted by TrenchFeeder

My friend does that all the time and it drives me up the wall. As if the 30 fewer calories will really make a difference.

TrenchFeeder,

LMAO!!! I know like the diet coke trumps the double quarter pounder and the large fry :-)

[mdickerson17]

This one I heard a while ago-Las Vegas NV, Dispatcher-"open mic on northwest units check your mic's" "Open mic- Dude, did you just fart?" Dispatcher-OPEN MIC! UNIT'S CHECK YOUR MIC'S!!! CHECK YOUR MIC'S! OPEN MIC ON NORTHWEST!!!!!!!" Lol one of the funniest things I ever heard! Laughing all night when I heard it!

[ScannerNuts]

One night I heard this from the neighboring city:

An officer radioed in, as he was actively involved in a foot chase in the downtown location. He called the dispatcher while out of breath said he was chasing a white male down the alley, currently running East on the alley between Second and Third Street.

Of course this was hard to understand because of wind noise and heavy breathing while running. The dispatcher requested for any other available units in the area to assist. An officer (in the car) replied that he was very near the alley area to please provide a further description of the white male that was fleeing.

The officer doing the foot pursuit responds, again in-between heavy breathing; White male, 30-40 years old, 175-pounds, 6-foot tall, Long hair.

Then the officer offering assistance asked: Is there a clothing description?

The officer on foot replies (again still running and breathing heavy): No clothing description, that is why I am chasing him. He is the one with no clothes.

[emd001]

Just a little while ago one of the pd units phone was ringing as he was talking, it was the banana phone ringtone. Dispatch was laughing so hard they had to key down and gather them selves before keying up again and finishing the transmission.

[powerhouse]

One of the best one's I've heard in a long time was a couple of months ago while listening to the local police jurisdiction on the over night shift at about 3 in the morning or so.
Dispatch: Unit xyz, please respond to 123 ABC street and see a Mrs.xxx. It seems her husband died 2-3 weeks ago........well, he's back and just walked through the door.
I almost fell out of the chair on that one.

powerhouse

[KB2BDB]

One from the railroads:

Overheard one day on CSX's road frequency:

It's standard for trains to have to slow down for track workers. It's also standard for the foreman of the crew to advice the train engineer that his train is out of the work zone, and also the crew will perform a "roll by" visual inspection of the train as it goes by, looking for dragging equipment, defects, etc..

Track crew foreman: Foreman Johnson to CSX train XXX, you're clear of the work zone, and you're clear on the roll by.

Train engineer: ROGER, clear of the work zone restriction, ok on the roll by. See yah tomorrow, Charlie!

Foreman: See yah tomorrow..HEY! Turn her around, we'll check the other side, too!

Scott

[Dak48]

Just heard this gem, courtesy Lincoln Police Department (Nebraska).

Dispatch: ... caller advises that the party walked up to her and said he "was from the planet Kryptonite" and had "super powers." caller states he asked our calling party where she was from... and then walked off.

XXX: Ummm... received.

Dispatch: Don't forget your cape.

XXX: I gotta find a phone booth first.

Dispatch: *giggle* 0840

[n7rvn]

Heard from King County Washington Deputy 25 years ago

Deputy: Boy 45

Dispatch; Go ahead

Deputy: I cant get through on the Woodinville-Duvall Road. (a 20 mile detour to an accident) There are about 100 pigs in the middle of the road. I have tried my horn, siren and even got out and tried to to get them to move but they wont budge. Is there anyone closer to the accident?

Dispatch: Did you get their badge numbers?

[freqs]

Just heard this on on my City Police .. Dispatcher says this is no joke we have a 10-96 with no pants on at Wood and Peters .about 4 Cars said can you repeat and he repeated with a laugh 10-96 no pants on at Wood and Peters .one cop came back... you just cant make stuff like that up .

[barry008]

Local county deputy: Dispatch, I've come up on some cows in the road.

Second deputy: You need any help moooooooving them?

[KB2BDB]

Heard recently on one of the Sheriff Department frequencies that I monitor:

Dispatcher: "Unit XXX status."

Deputy: "In a relationship".


Obviously, he's been on Facebook too much...

[sc8]

Here is some that I heard a while back, just never go a chance to post. The call involved a violent EDP.

Anytown 2XX to Base: You can show me en route

Anytown 2XY to Base: En route as well

Anytown 2XZ to Base: I'll also be enroute

Anytown Sergeant: Hey, I know you guys want the action but someone needs to stay in this town (call was in the next town over)

Anytown 2XX: What's going on, Bubblescum only has one guy on tonight?

Anytown 2XY to Base: Where is Swampgas road anyway?

Base: Standby one on that, Google Maps (c) is not being too cooperative, neither is CAD

[nosliwmj]

Originally Posted by barry008

Local county deputy: Dispatch, I've come up on some cows in the road.

Second deputy: You need any help moooooooving them?

I heard a call like this, but the officer (officer mable) was responding to loose goats along the highway. So the sergeant calls her up on the radio as officer maaaaaable (with the goat impression) to see if she needed any help with that... dispatch couldn't talk for a couple minutes after that because they kept cracking up on the radio...

[CapStar362]

yesterday i heard this in Clayton County GA:


Engine 12, Truck 13, Medic 7 and Command, respond to a possible house fire, (address here), called in third party by a neighbor, reporting smoke coming from the chimney. no further information. time out 14:24

yesterday the temps in ATL GA were in the teens and 20's

[nosliwmj]

Just heard a little bit ago....

Officer 1: run a cch on my subject

Officer 2: hey, he's good for drugs, just FYI

Officer 1: which one? Jr or Sr?

Officer 2: umm, the young guy, the one that looks like Mc lovin