Tulsa Barbie Joke
Off topic I know but i still feel it was worthy of sharing
Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie dolls especially for the Greater Tulsa market:
Jenks Barbie
This princess Barbie is sold only at The Plaza. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey, and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.
Broken Arrow Barbie
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
Oakhurst Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) ...unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.
Brookside Barbie
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership.. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.
Bixby Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt, and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud Light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.
Union Barbie
This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available.
Eastside Barbie
This plastic model comes in brown, white, yellow, or black skin tones. Wears low slung ropers with high rise thong panties. Multi type prescriptions available including, but not limited to Ativan, Percocet, or Lortabs. Optional Hud apartment or run down house with multiple dogs included. Can be purchased with food stamps. Ken doll not available, but look for Jose, I-Chin, Bubba, or “S Dogg” models sold separately.
Berryhill Barbie
Looks suspiciously like a cross dressed Ken doll. Optional looks are shaved head with multiple earrings and jewelry. Look for Puff, **Puff**, **Pass** accessory kit. Geo Tracker or Isuzu Trooper can be purchased separately. Berryhill Barbie can be found in an 80 year old house with duct tape holding the porch on. Has Lowes' Home Store on her speed dial cell.
Sapulpa Barbie
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Oakhurst Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
Cherry Street Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Midtown Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
Pine & Peoria Barbie
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.
Performing Arts Center Barbie
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.....
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