If you suffer from IBS (I Buy Scanners) like millions of other Americans, I have great news - there IS a cure: Divorce.
Divorce works by targeting the source of IBS - your wallet. It cleans out any spare (and even not-so-spare) money it finds in your wallet, bank accounts, couch cushions and dresser drawers. Divorce quickly rids you of excess, needless property such as your house, car and other valuables. Most patients who tried Divorce reported that even years after trying Divorce for the first time, they will probably never be able to afford a scanner again!
Side effects are generally mild and include frequent court hearings, irritation, anxiety, paper cuts and a sudden loss of disposable income. Patients with children may experience additional frustration with their local Child Support Enforcement Office, who can never seem to touch anything without completely screwing it up (and you over). Patients who find themselves marrying repeatedly may become dependent on Divorce. In rare cases, serious financial problems and homelessness have occurred that were attributed to Divorce. Use only as directed.
Ready to stop buying scanners and other expensive toys? Ask your lawyer if Divorce is right for you! :lol:
-AZ