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Everything else - Wow, you made it this far and still not sure? Oh well, post it here anyway

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  #801 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2013, 9:36 PM
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You just might be a Redneck...if you mow your grass, and find a car..
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  #802 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2013, 10:01 PM
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You might be a redneck if you think a bug zapper and a 6 pack is classic entertainment.
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  #803 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2013, 10:04 PM
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You might be a redneck if there are more than five McDonald's bags in your car.

( I once new this woman that had that plus all kinds of crap in here car, and she lived in a trailer. )
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Old 09-24-2013, 10:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimru View Post
Yo momma is so ugly, she looks like she was hit in the face with a bag of nickels!
Yo momma is so ugly, she looks like she fell from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

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You might be a redneck if you think a bug zapper and a 6 pack is classic entertainment.
That seals the deal. I'm a redneck.
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  #805 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2013, 10:23 PM
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  #806 (permalink)  
Old 09-24-2013, 11:17 PM
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You might be a redneck if you win a multi-million dollar lottery and think "Thank God! Now I can underpin my double wide!"
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Old 09-25-2013, 3:39 AM
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Yo mama is so fat, she has a wrist watch on each arm for the two different time zones.

You might be a redneck if yo mama wears a wrist watch on each arm for the two different time zones.
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  #808 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2013, 10:46 AM
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Yo momma so ugly even the elephant man paid to see her!
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  #809 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2013, 4:48 PM
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Default Yo mama...

Yo mama is so fat that her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.

You MIGHT be a redneck if you think "loading the dishwasher" means getting your wife drunk.
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  #810 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2013, 6:16 PM
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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?






"I lost my tractor."
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Old 09-25-2013, 6:24 PM
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Why did the cowboy adopt a dachshund?

He wanted to get a long little doggie.
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  #812 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2013, 6:56 PM
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What did the Bhuddist monk say to the hot-dog vendor?


"Make me one with everything"!
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Old 09-25-2013, 9:26 PM
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Old principals never die . . . they just lose their faculties!
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  #814 (permalink)  
Old 09-25-2013, 11:39 PM
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Old Cadillacs never die; the finance company just fades them away...
(Dizzy Gillespie)
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Old 09-26-2013, 9:17 AM
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Hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster
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Old 09-26-2013, 12:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by barry008 View Post
Hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster
Yeah, now she looks like she was taking that new diet drug noasitol and ended up with crack back.
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Old 09-27-2013, 4:56 PM
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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?".
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Old 09-27-2013, 4:59 PM
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A grizzly bear walked into a bar. The bartender said, "What'll you have?". The bear responded, "I'll have...........a beer.". The bartender countered, "What's with the huge pause?". The bear obviously misunderstood and replied, "I've always had huge paws.".
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  #819 (permalink)  
Old 09-27-2013, 5:05 PM
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A duck walked into a bar and asked for a glass of milk. The bartender obviously bothered by the notion of milk being consumed in his bar snapped back, "Get out of here duck, we don't have milk here!". The duck came back the next day. Same question. Same response, but the bartender added, "If you come back again asking for milk I'll nail your bill shut ON THIS BAR!!!". The next day the duck came back and asked the bartender, "Do you have any nails?". The bartender growled back, "No. Why?!", to which the duck responded, "I'd like a glass of milk.".
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Old 09-27-2013, 5:05 PM
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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.
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