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General Scanning Discussion - For general questions not specific to a model of scanner or general discussion of use of a scanner. Manufacturer specific posts should be directed to the appropriate forums below and location specific posts should go in the appropriate regional forum..

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  #3221 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 7:04 PM
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The funniest thing I ever heard was a few years back over the old Meadowlands radio...we were working a basketball game in the area we(Security) shared one frequency and we think there was a guard working traffic by the race track that was in his van....needles to say everybody was looking at each other and finally the Arena dispatcher stepped on the ongoing transmission. If I remember right they collected our radionics then went guard and collected out radios! Pritty funny to hear the play by play but pritty embarrassing for him and his lady friend!!
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  #3222 (permalink)  
Old 07-19-2012, 8:07 AM
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Heard this last night on one of the Buffalo (NY) police dispatch channels.

Dispatch: Units X and Y, respond to 123 Q Street, for a trespassing complaint. Caller reports a group of males sitting on the front porch. They will not leave, are dealing drugs, and are concealing it in their cheeks.
Unit X: Their cheeks?
Dispatch: Actually, I'm not going to say this on-air... well... (chuckles) it's not referring to the mouth cheeks.
Units X and Y (chuckling): Copy, enroute.
Unit Z (sounding eager): Disregard one of those units, dispatch, I'm going on the Cheeks Call.
Dispatch (almost busting up laughing): Copy....
Another unit said something else humorous at that point, which I could not hear over my own laughter, but I did catch the dispatcher, by this point really laughing, say, "All units, shshshshsh, shshshshsh!"

I love those clear, summer evenings when BPD comes in at my house, some 90 miles away. Living in "the woods" as I do, it is refreshing to hear so much activity. You sure do get some fantastic calls!
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  #3223 (permalink)  
Old 07-24-2012, 1:40 PM
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Just heard on Duke Lifelfight Ground Ops:

Duke XXX: Duke XXX to Duke, radio check
Duke: Good Copy, Duke XXX!
Duke XXX: Thank God for Q-Tips

not exactly sure what he meant, but it's still funny!
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  #3224 (permalink)  
Old 07-24-2012, 4:46 PM
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Shineth the light...

Last edited by kb2vxa; 09-18-2012 at 6:44 PM..
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  #3225 (permalink)  
Old 07-26-2012, 1:25 PM
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Head awhile back on the Amtrak PDX station ops frequency:

(Background: in order to have each trainset be overnight in Seattle regularly for maintenance, the Amtrak Cascades trainsets run on a cycle which requires people coming from Eugene at noon to switch trains in Portland. This means that there are often two northbound trains open at the same time.)

"I had to kick some people off of (the incoming train). You know, what train should I get on? The one that leaves, or the one that sits here all day?"
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  #3226 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2012, 3:51 AM
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Cool Funny Things I hear on my Scanner!

I seem to hear really random funny things on GRAND TRAVERSE COUNTY's Main Jail channel.
155.610(Jail Officer) "Bible Study is Finished in the Lobby...Ah Inmate Anderson in cell No#xxx needs "Tepee"
155.610(2nd Officer)" What?" I just gave him a roll 30 minutes ago!
155.610(Jail Officer) "Really? Ahh okay then he's all set?"
155.610(2nd Officer) "Yes and Inmate "Miller" Is returning form work release"
155.610(Jail Officer) "Well I will note in the Log this in the Log.
155.610(Jail Officer) "Inmate "Miller is Secured in cellxx.
This in English.....
Inmate Anderson was needing a roll of toilet paper, the funny part is that fact that they chatted about it in this odd manner. For this is the reason GRAND TRAVERSE COUNTY's JAIL BASE Frequency is NOT in my Priority channel set! LOL. I don't want to know about an inmate needing toilet paper....Thanks!
Also there is NEVER any real action on that channel so don't waste your time on it!
I have another one but I think that NATIONAL CHERRY FESTIVAL would charge me with defamation of character! I'm not Joking their Frequency was ridiculous this year!! I had their channel on my scanner and I was listening and laughing!! People were looking at me like "WTF?!"

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  #3227 (permalink)  
Old 07-28-2012, 2:08 PM
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If I were responding to the TP 30 minutes ago remark I would have called for an immediate shakedown to find out what he did with it. Yeah, I'm wise to the fact they make weapons out of anything and everything.

Hmmm, defamation of character would never cross their minds, like maybe damage control would be first on their minds if the radio traffic is THAT embarrassing. Sounds like the lifeguards around here, they think their HTs are private little CB chatterboxes. All day long mindless gossipy chatter as if I care who has the hots for who. Let this be a warning, you have heard about accidents caused by distracted drivers, we have distracted lifeguards.

Oh I won't say who but if you check the RR database it's not hard to figure out. (;->)
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Old 07-29-2012, 9:57 PM
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Nebraska State Patrol troopers using private call.
Troop#1-You there?
Troop#2-I am not able to answer right now. Please leave a message and I will get back to soon as I can.
Troop#1 (laughing)-This is (badge number) just wondering what you were doing for lunch.
Troop#2-Funny.

This is a new radio system they are using. The troopers are having a blast with private calls.
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  #3229 (permalink)  
Old 07-30-2012, 9:04 AM
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Talking Funniest/Weirdest thing you have heard on a scanner

I was scanning the murs frequencies and a man's voice came on and said "GET YOUR ****ING *** OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!". I was assuming they thought nobody could listen in to their radio with 120 "privacy" codes :-)
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Old 07-30-2012, 9:22 AM
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Yesterday someones son got hold of mommy/daddys portable and just started blasting f bombs, insults, and his desire to lose his virginity on the county's primary fire/ems dispatch channel. I got a few seconds of it on video before it ended.
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  #3231 (permalink)  
Old 07-30-2012, 9:35 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StephenVa View Post
Yesterday someones son got hold of mommy/daddys portable and just started blasting f bombs, insults, and his desire to lose his virginity on the county's primary fire/ems dispatch channel. I got a few seconds of it on video before it ended.
Hah, I want to hear that.

I've heard the local PD share the "passwords" for their in car computers numerous times... Being that I'm a Network Security guy, that wouldn't fly with me. But hey I don't manage their PCs / Servers / Network...
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Old 07-30-2012, 10:15 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Volt View Post
Hah, I want to hear that.
Not sure if I can post the link here due to the language but I sent you a pm with it. If the mods say it's ok I'll link it here.
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  #3233 (permalink)  
Old 07-30-2012, 10:21 AM
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Heard many stops on the air, when the officer doing the stop has to tell driver to" please stay in the vehicle" while he has the mic keyed,lol!

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n9zas
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  #3234 (permalink)  
Old 07-30-2012, 1:18 PM
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Default Funny dispatch

I was listening to CFD dispatch in Columbus and I heard a call on the auto dispatch system and it made me laugh so hard just the way it spoke it.

Beep beep beep medic 22 engine 22 PF CHANGS xxxxxx street.... CHOKING MEDIC 22 engine 22 PF CHANGS... Xxxxxx street CHOKING. respond on 9-delta

It paused after PF CHANGS then said the street

Last edited by gtaman; 07-30-2012 at 1:21 PM..
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  #3235 (permalink)  
Old 07-30-2012, 1:24 PM
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Talking Funny dispatch

Another CFD dispatch was

Beep beeP beep. Medic xx grant hospital I'll person. Medic xx. Grant hospital ill. Person
Respond on 9-delta
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  #3236 (permalink)  
Old 07-30-2012, 7:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gr8rcall View Post
Just heard on Duke Lifelfight Ground Ops:

Duke XXX: Duke XXX to Duke, radio check
Duke: Good Copy, Duke XXX!
Duke XXX: Thank God for Q-Tips

not exactly sure what he meant, but it's still funny!
Probably cleaned whatever he spilled on the radio out of it.
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Old 07-30-2012, 7:49 PM
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PMR3 Comms.
PMR3 go ahead.
Proceed to 37 S***ge Crescent, assist lady locked house and car keys inside car.
PMR3 10-2
Unknown #1 "S***ge Crescent? Walk away from the car, some hood will throw a rock through the window within 10 minutes."
Unknown #2 " Nip down the cells, there'll be someone down there good at getting into locked cars...."
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  #3238 (permalink)  
Old 07-31-2012, 11:23 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kb2vxa View Post
If I were responding to the TP 30 minutes ago remark I would have called for an immediate shakedown to find out what he did with it. Yeah, I'm wise to the fact they make weapons out of anything and everything.

Hmmm, defamation of character would never cross their minds, like maybe damage control would be first on their minds if the radio traffic is THAT embarrassing. Sounds like the lifeguards around here, they think their HTs are private little CB chatterboxes. All day long mindless gossipy chatter as if I care who has the hots for who. Let this be a warning, you have heard about accidents caused by distracted drivers, we have distracted lifeguards.

Oh I won't say who but if you check the RR database it's not hard to figure out. (;->)
Shakedown. Maybe he'd bust out of jail by holding up the guards with the "tepee"' tube. And then tie 'em up with the paper.
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  #3239 (permalink)  
Old 08-01-2012, 11:03 AM
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About 1998 I was listening to a railroad channel on a previous scanner. The train operaters said that a pickup stopped on the tracks. One of the operaters checked it out and the pickup driver was passed out and reeked of alchohol.
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  #3240 (permalink)  
Old 08-01-2012, 1:02 PM
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Default Amazing how a little "search" would help many posters.

The link you posted has been around since December 2003, has at least 162 pages with over 3200 posts of "Funniest/Weirdest...a scanner", some of which are funny. Maybe the people will see your link and spent the rest of the week reading........LOL.
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