The difference between a non-trunking analog, trunking analog and trunking digital scanner is not just in the software. Yes, it has a lot to do with it, but there are considerable hardware differences as well. You can't simply flash the scanner with magic firmware to transform it into somthing it was not designed to do.
As others have stated, you are in a mixed analog/digital area with the analog quickly making the switch to digital. My advice to you, return or sell the scanner the wife bought you and put that money into a good digital trunking scan. My personal favorite is the PRO-107 from RadioShack. Explain to your wife that you appreciate what she did, but it is basically useless to you and you need to get a more capable unit for your area (trust me, she will understand
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Well, useless is a harsh word and not 100% correct. You do have some conventional stuff around you, but without the scanner being AT LEAST analog trunking capable, you can't even listen to Newport News (Motorola SmartNet) or Hampton (EDACS Standard Wide). So go with at least somthing trunking, but seriously consider putting the money into the digital unit. Down the road, you will be happy that you spent the extra money on somthing you WILL need for sure.