Funny/Odd things heard on the scanner

PBN1979

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Aug 1, 2008
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Metro Detroit
Tasmania police are the best. I love listening to the Tasmania feed online just for the humor.

The other day, there was a call about loose lambs in the roadway.
The officer arrived on scene and said "Mary got them" (as in "Mary had a little lamb"). The dispatcher laughed and then another officer got on the radio and made lamb sounds.

Yesterday, a man called about an unknown subject at his door. He had been going through a series of problems with his neighbors and feared they had sent someone over to threaten him.
One officer knew the location well and said "the caller has the house with the sign advertising honey. The neighbor has the house next door with a sign advertising eggs". The dispatcher got on and said "I guess the chicken didnt cross the road".

Awhile back, there was a welfare check on a man sleeping in a car. The caller could only describe the location as "the side of the bridge toward the moon".
Dispatcher: "can you tell what direction the moon is in?"
Officer: "up".

Being American, I also think its funny when they refer to people as "blokes", like "check the bloke standing around the carpark".
 

NWI_Scanner_Guy

I'M LISTENING TO YOU :~)
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Jan 23, 2008
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Hammond, IN
You tell 'em officer!!


I didn't hear the original call(s), but just heard an officer call in to dispatch, finishing up a multiple return visit to a residence....

Officer: This is my fourth time here. Once again, no loud music. Just the same six guys sitting in a garage smoking cigars and having some beers. I won't come back again unless the caller gives his name and address and wants to speak with an officer. I'm clear from this location.


By the tone of his voice, he sounded like he would like to know the person who was calling in multiple loud noise disturbances and have a few words with him/her.
 

drclaws

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Apr 7, 2020
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Local fire toned out for someone reported seeing orange flames at a house seen though a wooded area...

Responding unit - "We're clear...Halloween decorations"
 

N8LHG

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Local fire toned out for someone reported seeing orange flames at a house seen though a wooded area...

Responding unit - "We're clear...Halloween decorations"
This reminds me of something that happened to us about 15 or 20 years ago. I'm going to share it because the Halloween decorations theme just triggered a memory. We use to live in Central Ohio, and didn't get along too well with one of our neighbors. They would call the police if our car was a foot too far forward in the street edging in on their street area in front of their house. They also complained if the lawnmower touched too close to their property. They were unhappy people. Use to happen quite a bit... Anyway... We had this plastic skeleton that our kids use to play with during Halloween. It was about 4 feet tall, and one day they placed it in the back yard on a reclining deck chair. Fact/true story -- We got a knock on the door one afternoon by a police officer who apologized when we answered the door. He said I'm really sorry, but I have to check out a complaint of a "dead body" seen in your lawn chair. Of course the complaint was "anonymous", but we invited the officer to our yard. Once he saw the plastic skeleton, we all got a big laugh out of it, the officer apologizing as he left. For many months after, the skeleton was seen sitting on my kids swing set, sitting on the slide, and propped up enjoying a sweet tea under an umbrella. As he aged in the weather, his bones began falling off his body, and he was eventually tossed in the trash. Made quite a long running joke out of him, and I'm sure the "anonymous" complainer was not happy with us.
 

zerg901

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Apr 19, 2005
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female dispatcher says - 'we have tug action on the ramp'

immediate male reply is - "tug action; roger"

(no further traffic heard)
 

mws72

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Quad-Cities (IA-IL) USA
Last place I worked at. We would get phone calls from 911 saying they had calls about fire by the south wall of the plant. It tuned out people driving past on the interstate could see what looked like fire was actually just the security light through tall grass.
 

CrabbyMilton

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Jul 28, 2008
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I just heard one on the FD main channel. The dispatcher says on the main TG... I can’t transmit on Firecall. I think they have an open mic. I can’t understand it. Yeah I don’t know if they are available or not because I don’t think they can hear anything. Then someone finally tells her that she’s the one with the open mic. This dispatcher often gets bumbly and stumbly.
 

delaware74b

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May 8, 2010
Messages
34
On my feed yesterday for unattended cooking:
Fire officer: "Squad 1 to Dover, (street name) under control. Unattended turkey"
Dispatch: "(street name) is under control, unattended turkey at (time)" you could tell dispatch did a second take with the gap in response.
 

zapman987

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Jan 16, 2014
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nc, recently moved to jax, FL
Dispatched for dog in roadway. Responding officer has to clarify its not a hog thats known to live in the area. Dispatch: "na that hog is up a few more miles normally". Officer on scene: "its not a dog or a hog, its a goat!"
Goat ended up running into woods when approached.
 
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