Just be honest with your HOA. They aren't all bad. What's the worst that can happen, they say no? I live in a Townhouse and I've got a 24' Rhon tower in my back yard!
I simply explained that I was using my radio for community service with our local Sheriff's Dept. (and presented a letter from the director of communations) They wanted to know why I needed a tower and my response was so I could hit the repeater. I offered to put a smaller tower in the front yard but they denied that one. I understand not everyone has an affiliation with public safety
or can document it. My point here is If you don't ask, your situation will remain the same, period.
THEN you can begin to think about stealth options.
They were more than happy to approve my request with only a couple of restrictions. They required that the tower could not be seen above my roof line. I only wanted to bring my
antenna above the roof line. Their last request was to require me to paint the antenna light blue so it "would blend in with the sky". I happily agreed to both requests. That was over 15 years ago and I haven't heard a peep since. In fact last year they approved a shiny new 145' longwire running from my house back into the woods. So far, not ONE person has even noticed it!
Here are a couple of options for you just in case....
As far as I know, an HOA can't stop you or shall approve satellite antennas or digital TV antennas. Mounting a small antenna similar to this
Laird TE Connectivity FG4500 UHF GMRS 450-470 MHz Base Repeater Antenna on a pushup pole or the top of a satellite dish mount probably won't attract too much attention. Especially if you paint it light blue so it will "Blend in with the sky"
Best of luck.