Funny/Odd things heard on the scanner

[dnrocc]

Galveston Dispatcher: "Medic 3 please be in route to XXXX 61st, have a 32 year old male who has an infection inside his penis. He'll be waiting outside in a black jacket."

 

[dnrocc]

Galveston Dispatcher: "2063 Copy a suspicious person."
2063: "Go Ahead"
Galveston Dispatcher: "6303 Broadway, I have a white male screaming and yelling he's Elvis Presley. He was asked to leave and is refusing."

Followup

2063: "Be advised Elvis has left the building and has requested a courtesy ride to Texas City. I'm gonna give him a ride real quick to Texas City"
Galveston Dispatcher: "10-4"

Later that afternoon.

Galveston Dispatcher: "2063"
2063: "Go ahead"
Galveston Dispatcher: "I have Elvis Presley the guy you took to Texas City on the line, he's requesting a ride back to Galveston"
Probably a supervisor: "Tell him no"
Galveston Dispatcher: "That's what I have been telling him for the last 5 minutes"

 

[nosferatu666]

"The registered owner says her boyfriend put it into park while she was driving."

Erhhh she put it in park... I may have pulled the keys out first... either way the entire ignition system sheared off in the steering column locking it permanently in park... quite literally 20ft from the drive way...

 

[zapman987]

gotta love this: "Need a check on a (license and plate) from GA."
"Comes back with warrant, extremely violent and dangerous, likely armed, approach with caution. Other warrants have similar. (As a minor afterthought in tone) Oh and his GA license is suspended".

"Ok but is any thing wrong with the vehicle" " tag expired with inspection violation, otherwise no 29s"

 

[K5TXC]

From Springfield, MO police dispatcher to units: Check the welfare of subject, he was being followed by two vehicles and now someone is knocking on the bottom of his vehicle. He has a buck knife which he will leave on the seat of his car. He is also wearing a "Lets Go Brandon" t-shirt.

 

[JethrowJohnson]

About a month or two ago one night, an officer was dispatched to an area for a pit bull on the loose and the officer thought he said pygmy, and they were teasing him about it for a second and he eventually found it and said, pygmy goats are pretty fast, I don't know if we can catch it. It was running between houses and yards and they couldn't get him at first but they probably did eventually. I went to bed soon after that call.

 

[WeldGuy]

After a couple attempts to get the correct message to the dispatcher, the Deputy said, "I'll just use my cell phone. It's more reliable than these radios."

 

[BinaryMode]

Heard a page for the fire department for an outdoor smoke investigation near a drive-thru restaurant. Upon battalion 1 arriving on scene dispatched radioed that the crematorium across the street called and said it was "over heating."

 

[screenersam]

A Maryland State Trooper has stopped a man who claims to be the President of the United States. The man told the trooper that he does not have any insurance, is the President, and is on his way to Washington DC.

 

[CrabbyMilton]

A Maryland State Trooper has stopped a man who claims to be the President of the United States. The man told the trooper that he does not have any insurance, is the President, and is on his way to Washington DC.

So Uncle Joe got the keys to the Beast.

 

[CrabbyMilton]

After a couple attempts to get the correct message to the dispatcher, the Deputy said, "I'll just use my cell phone. It's more reliable than these radios."

Spend millions on a radio system and then it doesn't work properly. Scary in a intense situation.

 

[CrabbyMilton]

Galveston Dispatcher: "2063 Copy a suspicious person."
2063: "Go Ahead"
Galveston Dispatcher: "6303 Broadway, I have a white male screaming and yelling he's Elvis Presley. He was asked to leave and is refusing."

Followup

2063: "Be advised Elvis has left the building and has requested a courtesy ride to Texas City. I'm gonna give him a ride real quick to Texas City"
Galveston Dispatcher: "10-4"

Later that afternoon.

Galveston Dispatcher: "2063"
2063: "Go ahead"
Galveston Dispatcher: "I have Elvis Presley the guy you took to Texas City on the line, he's requesting a ride back to Galveston"
Probably a supervisor: "Tell him no"
Galveston Dispatcher: "That's what I have been telling him for the last 5 minutes"

When it was all over, I suppose someone came on to announce that Elvis Presley has left the jurisdiction.

 

[CrabbyMilton]

I remember one from a long time ago. I sounded like a small business of some sort. The owner or manager had a higher pitched voice and was whining about everything to his people. "I didn't buy those radios for you guys to shoot the crap." Then he comes on and says..."Why can't you guys answer the phone? Why do you keep transferring the calls up here to me?" The one guy says..."It's your wife" Who knows, perhaps one of them called her asking her to call the whiney boss to calm him down.

 

[AB4BF]

"Proceed to xxx Street, see the lady who says she has an imaginary person in her crawl space".

I didn't hear the rest I was laughing so loud...

 

[JeremyG760]

Not sure if this is normal or not, but I could hear USCG talking to a vessel off of Catalina Island (could only hear USCG, not the vessel via a patch on my county's system) and they asked the vessel to do a count up to and then back down from 10. Seemed weird. Trying to verify if its a real person and not a hoax/recording?

 

[KB7MIB]

Not sure if this is normal or not, but I could hear USCG talking to a vessel off of Catalina Island (could only hear USCG, not the vessel via a patch on my county's system) and they asked the vessel to do a count up to and then back down from 10. Seemed weird. Trying to verify if its a real person and not a hoax/recording?

Maybe they were trying to triangulate the vessel's position, and they need a certain amount of transmission time to do that?

John
Peoria, AZ

 

[mmckenna]

Not sure if this is normal or not, but I could hear USCG talking to a vessel off of Catalina Island (could only hear USCG, not the vessel via a patch on my county's system) and they asked the vessel to do a count up to and then back down from 10. Seemed weird. Trying to verify if its a real person and not a hoax/recording?

USCG has radio direction finding capability. Having the vessel do a 10 count gives them a solid and long enough signal to get their direction. If you can get 2 or more direction finders on them, you can triangulate their location.

 

[JeremyG760]

Maybe they were trying to triangulate the vessel's position, and they need a certain amount of transmission time to do that?

John
Peoria, AZ

USCG has radio direction finding capability. Having the vessel do a 10 count gives them a solid and long enough signal to get their direction. If you can get 2 or more direction finders on them, you can triangulate their location.

Thanks to both of you. Makes perfect sense, but I didn't realize it was a thing. Typically I have that TG avoided as what I'd want to hear is overwhelmed by Long Beach harbor pilots.

 

[acj76]

Disp: "Tompkins ###"
Unit: "###"
Disp: "Just so you're advised, we've taken several calls about a male in the middle of the road at Fulton and State attempting to direct traffic when he's not dancing."

 

[bradenmikael]

I have one better:

Two weeks ago, I had my scanner turned on and an EMS call came through about a woman throwing up worms, along with worms coming out of her two unmentionable private parts as well. I couldn’t believe what I heard. That’s the craziest scanner call I’ve heard in all of my years of monitoring.